IRISH TWINS – a biography. Why hate your brother?

3 votes Created 2 months ago

“Jasus, the ruddy fugher” I called him. Mum beat me for cursing. I was done with him when we turned 14. Where’s the respect; I’m the older brother!

An Irish twin means having a sibling born within 12 months of you. In 19th century America and Britain it was a disparaging term used to describe siblings from poor Irish immigrant families. Technically, “Jasus” and I aren’t Irish twins as his birth falls 6 days outside the definition! Still, the insults come.

  • “Incestors!” – that’s rubbish! Dad is from ten miles yonder in Bally_____.
  • “We’re like rabbits!” - I socked that eejit in the gob and did six months.
  • “Typical Irish Catholics” – It’s not our fault that contraception was outlawed. (I’d have loved if mum indulged in pre-incarnation murder!)

Mum says the lack of breastfeeding made me mad. I’m grey around the ears and she still sings ‘baby blues’ songs to me! Although “Jasus” is a looker and stands at 6’ 2”, being almost 5’ 10” is fine by me. 

We haven’t spoken in ten years, since my girlfriend said it was an innocent mistake. I didn’t buy it as we don’t look alike but I was done with her anyway. My nephew is now three. 

Blood is blood, so lets make up. Nope. No way. He’s not cut from me. 

Why do I hate my Irish Twin?

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