Am I normal in the sack?
It’s what an Irish Times survey in 2015 tried to ascertain, receiving over 12,000 responses to an online survey. In Irish bedrooms it was found that 41% of Irish women are “very happy” with their sex lives while only 30% of Irish men are. The survey found lesbians are the most happy.
Sexologist Emily Power Smith commented:
‘I wonder whether the men in this survey may have been describing their lack of satisfaction regarding the amount of sex they are having rather than the quality of the sex.’
On average, Irish people lose their virginity at 19 although bisexual females were sexually active at 17.6 years.
Frequency of sex
Excluding virgins, 7% of the Irish surveyed didn’t have sex in the past year while 44% had sex ‘at least once a week’ and 14% did it ‘three or more times a week’.
The ‘honeymoon period’ is said to last for between six months to a year. It’s surely then no surprise that sexual frequency drops off the longer a couple are a unit. If a couple has been together for between 2 and 7 years, only 60% of them have sex once a week. This falls to 41% for couples who have been together between 7 and 15 years.
It’s a lie to suggest that the most sexually active are the 17 to 24 age group. That title goes to the 25 to 34 year olds as 51% of them have sex one or more times a week.
In a committed relationship, 61% said sex was ‘very important’ while 35% said it was ‘unimportant’.
Whose sex drive is higher?
Interestingly the longer a relationship wears on the more likely the man will think he is more horny. The longer a couple lasts the more a man wants sex as a woman's desire falls off a cliff.
Comparing sex drives
Woman’s view About the same Mine is higher His is higher
Relationship of less than 6 months 59% 17% 23%
relationship of 6 months to 1 year 56% 24% 20%
relationship of 1 to 2 years 49% 25% 26%
Relationship of 2 to 7 years 38% 26% 36%
Relationship of 7 to 15 years 30% 23% 47%
Relationship of 15 to 30 years 33% 23% 44%
Man’s view About the same Mine is higher Hers is higher
Relationship of less than 6 months 61% 21% 18%
relationship of 6 months to 1 year 52% 29% 18%
relationship of 1 to 2 years 43% 38% 19%
Relationship of 2 to 7 years 32% 56% 13%
Relationship of 7 to 15 years 18% 74% 8%
Relationship of 15 to 30 years 17% 77% 5%
About sex drives sexologist Smith has this to say:
‘Interestingly, people who are unhappy with their sex lives often find it takes up a lot more of their time than those who are happy, because they are worrying about it and missing it and wanting it. There’s a saying among sex therapists that a good sex life takes up about 30 per cent of a couple’s energy and a bad sex life takes up about 70 per cent of their energy.’
Most important element for intimacy?
Results varied according to gender and sexuality when considering what it takes to get in the mood for sex. 26% of heterosexual females found ‘trust’ to be an essential ingredient while only 15% of heterosexual males did. Hetero guys are more interested in ‘feeling desired (24%). 90% said that they were physically affectionate without having sex. However, without affection there is a slim chance of intimacy!
Ingredients for intimacy
Feeling desired 22%
Good communication 19%
While 91% of those in a relationship are monogamous, the seven year itch appears true as that that point affairs tended to start. Of those who answered questions relating to infidelity, male cheaters favored one-night stands which makes it more about sex while women who were unfaithful had longer affairs supporting the notion of women seeking intimacy.
Sex is one thing, but it takes love and heartbreak to make a human! Or does it? Comments below...